Check out the formula:
8 letters in “Tom Brady”.
He’s won 3 Super Bowls.
His Jersey number is 12.
He’s playing in SB 49.
He was pick #199 in NFL draft.
He won the ’98 Rose Bowl.
He played with 11 deflated balls in AFC Championship.
He started drinking at the age of 21.
Tom Brady is the DEVIL.
Marshawn’s Media Day:
During the Super Bowl’s “Media Day,” Seattle running back MARSHAWN LYNCH continued his stand-off with the press by answering about 30 questions over the course of five minutes with variations of the phrase: “I’m just here so I won’t get fined.” He did stop the press questions briefly to blow a kiss to a fan and tell her she was, quote, “sexy too.” The fines are what started this nonsense. Last season, Marshawn was hit was a $50,000 penalty for skipping out on postgame interviews, which the NFL required. That was later bumped up to $100,000, because of another media violation.
(Look, I’m sure Marshawn is a decent guy, and maybe he’s being misunderstood in some way . . . although he could always clear that up by actually, you know, SAYING something.)
(He may have a good reason for doing what he’s doing. Maybe the media has twisted his words or misquoted him . . . or maybe he just finds the whole process cheesy, repetitive, pointless, and / or overly P.C.)
(But he makes over $7 million a year . . . to PLAY FOOTBALL. And being available to the press at certain times is part of the deal. You have to take care of the fans, because they make it possible for you to earn $7 million.)
(EVERYONE has aspects of their job that they don’t love. Is it really worth it for Marshawn to continue this nonsense . . . to the point where some people think he’s coming off as a prima donna and an ungrateful jerk? LYNCH does lots of charity work so why wouldn’t he use yesterday’s platform to push his projects..I’ve seen hundreds of athletes like this guy…It’s pretty simple the media just needs to ban together and not bother with him…soon he’ll be tripping over himself to talk to you…Go grab your crotch, and eat your skittles in front of YOUR EMPTY podium…I’ll be over here interviewing Rob Gronkowski who by the way had some fun with media day.
“The Gronk” read a line from “A Gronking To Remember”, the Gronk-themed erotica that surfaced on Amazon earlier this month. (Here’s video.)
(Here’s some more video of Gronk. It starts getting fun at the 2:45 mark. He says a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with milk is his “go-to meal” before a game. And he sings a few lines from a couple Katy Perry songs.)
Christopher Reeve’s Mantastic Son is Joining SportsCenter
MATT REEVE, the 22-year-old son of CHRISTOPHER REEVE, has been hired to do special reports for ESPN’s “SportsCenter”. He says, quote, “My parents definitely define who I am.
“My dad and I had a huge bond and shared a love of sports. I would hope they would be proud and say, ‘Great job,’ no matter what. Then my dad would probably tell me to straighten my tie!”
(Man I have to say I’m cheering for this dude. He’s faced big time adversity. First it was his father’s accident and eventual death . . . then his mother’s death from lung cancer at the age of 44 . . . and the suicide of Robin Williams, who was a close family friend.
THE CYBER SPOTLIGHT
An Archer Is So Good, He Can Shoot an Incoming Arrow . . . and Split It in Two
A guy from Denmark named Lars Andersen has a YouTube page that’s been getting a ton of hits recently. He’s an archer who focuses on shooting multiple arrows as quickly as possible, WHILE running. And he’s CRAZY good at it.
His newest trick-shot video has racked up more than 20 million views this week, and it’s insane.
He shoots the edge of a knife, and splits an arrow in two . . . catches an arrow out of the AIR . . . and shoots three arrows back-to-back in under a SECOND. But his best trick is when another guy shoots an arrow AT him . . . and he splits it in half.
(Search for “Lars Andersen: A New Level of Archery.” He shoots the knife at 2:50, catches an arrow at 3:05, shoots three arrows in under a second at 5:06, and splits an incoming arrow at 5:36.)
A Reporter Was Out in the Snow, and Almost Got Hit by a Skidding Car
A reporter in New York named Stacey Bell was covering the snowstorm Monday night, when a car behind her started sliding around and almost ran her OVER. And she had no idea, because her back was turned.
It kind of looks like the driver was trying to make the car drift on PURPOSE. Luckily everyone’s okay. (Search for “Skidding Car Nearly Crashes Into NBC Reporter.” The full video is at the bottom of the page.)
HUMP DAY HILARITY….
A 44-year-old guy in England was busted a few years ago for having sex with a SHETLAND PONY. Witnesses saw him take the pony into the woods, and cops found him, quote, “sweating profusely and smelling strongly of horses.” A test also found the horse’s DNA on him . . . but he claims he was just out for a walk.
A storm that was predicted to give New York City 12 to 18 inches of snow ended up giving most of the city only four to six inches. Which proves the storm was male.
A 52-year-old guy in Tampa found his cat dead in the street earlier this month, after being hit by a car. So he buried him. But five days later, the cat showed up at his HOUSE. So either it was a ZOMBIE CAT . . . or it was initially unconscious, dug his way out of the grave, and wandered home.
WIN THIS WEDNESDAY!